FOR SEXUAL FAVOURS

[Napier_E36 0]

Office Dares - Don't Be Chicken!

ONE-POINT DARES

1. Run one lap around the office at top speed

2. Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other'non-player'

must be in the toilet at the time).

3. Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.

4. Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say,

"Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."

5. To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your head.

6. When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper

huskily, "Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good!"

7. Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say,

"Sorry, I really prefer it this way".

8. Walk sideways to the photocopier.

9. While riding in a lift, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.

THREE-POINTS DARES

1. Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with

double-barreled fingers.

2. Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask, "Did you get all

that, I don't want to have to repeat it".

3. Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).

4. Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle

(there must be a 'non-player' within sight).

5. Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

FIVE POINT DARES

1. At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to

conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you

actually launch into it yourself).

2. Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with

growing irritation, turn the light switchon/off 10 times.

3. For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob".

4. Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a

number two".

5. After every sentence, say 'mon' in a really bad Jamaican accent.As in

"the report's on your desk, mon". Keep this up for one hour.

6. While an office mate is out, move their chair into the lift.

7. In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and

mutter, "Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!"

8. At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce, "As God is my

witness, I'll never go hungry again."

9. In a colleague's diary, write in 10am: "See how I look in tights".

10. Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask "You wanna

trade?"

11. Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do

you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now".

12. Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say,"I can't talk

about it".

13. Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a

lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.

14. Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during a very

important conference call.

15. Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.

16. Hang a two-foot long piece of toilet roll from the back of your

pants and act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.

17. Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and biscuit, smash

each biscuit with your fist.

18. During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the

door.

19. Arrange toy figures on the table to represent each meeting attendee,

move them according to the movements of their real-life counterparts.

And if that wasn't enough for you here are some examples of insane acts

you can use anywhere...

1. At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a

hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to

have to let one of you go."

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries

with that.

4. Put your rubbish bin on your desk and label it "IN."

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten

over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the subject field for all your e-mails, write " FOR SEXUAL

FAVOURS".

7. Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."

8. Don't use any punctuation

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle

sounds all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party

because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.

17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time

this week!!!"

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling,

"Run for your lives, they're loose!"

:pimp: :mosh:

[Dnz 0]

hahah Those are goood. :mosh:

[Guest Zwilling]

In a colleague's diary, write in 10am: "See how I look in tights".

That's the shizzle

[Grant 4]

That is very funny, I might try them next week in the office.

Cheers

[*sic 1]

haha work here i come...

god i hate the office

[Homy.D.Clown 0]

Dammit..i want an office job where i can try these..damo get me a job with you..dont worry i dont think i'll last the week... :mosh:

fark just imagine the fun we could have...and if the office people got all like "grrr"

we could like ,pull a fat west and front kick them in the face....

oooo even better..get zeb to try some of these out on the general public...

.."Run one lap around the pulled over vehicle at top speed"

...set your watch alarm to lunchtime..pull some perp up and start writing out a ticket..when the alarm goes off drop the ticket, yell "playtime"and get in your car and drive off (to mackers...to play on the slides)

ep ep ep

[dave 2]

hahah lmfao! we gotta try some of these! :rambo: