greenday-rulz21 6 Report post Posted August 5, 2008 (edited) Got sent these in an email and some aren't bad! Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled 'Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden'...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language. ------------------------------------------ The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone. ------------------------------------------- Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S. Treasury. ------------------------------------------- Men can read smaller print than women can - women can hear better. ------------------------------------------- Coca-Cola was originally green. ------------------------------------------- It is impossible to lick your elbow. ------------------------------------------- The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska ------------------------------------------- Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history: Spades - King David Hearts - Charlemagne Clubs -Alexander the Great Diamonds - Julius Caesar ---------------------------------------------------------------------- 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321 ------------------------------------------------------------------------ If a statue in a park, of a person on a horse, has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what? A. Their birthplace ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested? A. Obsession ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter 'A'? A. One thousand ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common? A. All were invented by women. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil? A. Honey ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Q. Which day are there more reverse charge calls than any other day of the year? A. Father's Day ------------------------------------------------------------ In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on.. Hence the phrase......... 'goodnight, sleep tight.' ------------------------------------------------------------------------ It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ In pubs, beer is ordered by pints and quarts... So in the old days when customers got unruly, the Innkeeper would yell at them 'Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down.' It's where we get the phrase 'mind your P's and Q's' ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Many years ago, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. 'Wet your whistle' is the phrase inspired by this practice. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow! Edited August 5, 2008 by Nick021 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pjay 8 Report post Posted August 5, 2008 lol. awesome. im part of the 25% that didnt try Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elmarco 56 Report post Posted August 5, 2008 lol. awesome. im part of the 25% that didnt try Where's your sense of adventure? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
advantex 0 Report post Posted August 5, 2008 I have read some of these from other sources, including wikipedia so suspect most are true. Good one. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hotwire 352 Report post Posted August 5, 2008 (edited) Interesing reading. So Nick - what part did you come back & edit - the at least 75% of people will try & lick their elbow? For the record - I did - try - that is Edited August 5, 2008 by hotwire Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nic325i 0 Report post Posted August 5, 2008 Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled 'Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden'...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language. I prefer Robin Williams theory on the origin of golf. One of the funniest bits of stand up I've seen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bravo 35 Report post Posted August 6, 2008 (edited) Wonder if my brother's fiance will let him get pissed for a whole month after the wedding on the pretence of upholding a 4000 year old tradition? Edited August 6, 2008 by bravo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
briancol 3 Report post Posted August 6, 2008 Many years ago, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. Now that's a great idea. I think I'll try it at the next Bimmersport meeting at Garrisons. Brrrreeeeep another Heinekin please! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
advantex 0 Report post Posted August 6, 2008 I prefer Robin Williams theory on the origin of golf. One of the funniest bits of stand up I've seen Now that I did enjoy - good find Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
greenday-rulz21 6 Report post Posted August 6, 2008 Interesing reading. So Nick - what part did you come back & edit - the at least 75% of people will try & lick their elbow? For the record - I did - try - that is Haha, yea I did to. When I copied it only copied half, didn't realise till I posted. Man i'm a noob That whistle in the ceramic cups is a great idea! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites