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cainchapman

Dog bite Diet

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I've got a large dog. So I bought a large bag of Meaty Bites at Big W and was

standing in line at the check-out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I

was starting The Meaty Bites Diet again, although I probably shouldn't

because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 25 kgs

before I woke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my

orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it

works is to load your pants pockets with Meaty Bites and simply eat one or

two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so

I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now

enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her. Horrified,

she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had

been poisoned by the food. I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting

in the middle of the road licking my dick and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard

as he staggered out the door.

Stupid bitch...why else would I buy dog food??

Edited by Cain

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nice one mate , must remember that one incase it happens to me, was she blonde

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Bloody classic!!

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Haha thats awesome.

Kinda like this intellegent Green acres painter thats painting my gf's house.

Was wrapping everything up in drop cloths and got to the piano and goes "mmm this your piano?"

Nah it's the coffee table.

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