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pjay

Lol's of today

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A few things I came across today, that really made me giggle.

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"Grandma Noooo"

HHAHAHA

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love that one Simon! i wondered where the joke in it was :lol:

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MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE

NICKNAMES:

If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

If Mike , Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT:

When the bill arrives, Mike , Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY:

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

BATHROOMS:

A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel ..

The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS:

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE:

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS:

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE:

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DRESSING UP:

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL:

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING:

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

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A Blonde woman Ran Over A Mattress On The Highway,

And Decided Not To Worry And Kept Driving.

The Ensuing Jumble Finally Whipped Around Enough to

Tear A Hole In The Fuel Tank.

The Subsequent Lack Of Fuel Is What Finally

Brought Her Vehicle To Its Knees.

She Had Still Managed To Drive 30 More Miles

With A 60-Pound Tangle of Stuff Wrapped

Around Her Drive shaft.

She Had It Towed To Her Dealership And Complained

That The Vehicle Had A "Sort Of Shimmy"

When She Was Driving At High Speeds.

Below Are The Photo's Of What They

Found At Her Dealership....................

The First Photo Is By Far The Best.

"Sort Of A Shimmy" I'll Bet It Did !

post-2707-1271212026.jpg

post-2707-1271212046.jpg

Edited by E30 325i Rag-Top

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haha some good stuff here! i just found this vid on youtube, didn't think it was that funny til the music came on, then suddenly i was on the floor laughing

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Guest Ari Gold

That first facebook one is awesome! What games were those style of commands from again? I remember playing them ages ago.

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Text based games yo.

I used to play some cave one on my Mac Classic which I still have! Colossal cave!! That was it!

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A Blonde woman Ran Over A Mattress On The Highway,

And Decided Not To Worry And Kept Driving.

The Ensuing Jumble Finally Whipped Around Enough to

Tear A Hole In The Fuel Tank.

The Subsequent Lack Of Fuel Is What Finally

Brought Her Vehicle To Its Knees.

She Had Still Managed To Drive 30 More Miles

With A 60-Pound Tangle of Stuff Wrapped

Around Her Drive shaft.

She Had It Towed To Her Dealership And Complained

That The Vehicle Had A "Sort Of Shimmy"

When She Was Driving At High Speeds.

One of our drivers dit it and the truck caught fire and was completly destroyed,it got caught around the exhaust

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