Welcome to my Life. (textsfromlastnight)

[Guest Ari Gold]

http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/

Lofr

Ugh, memory, stop!

[Jamez 2147483647]

if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder

hahah

[kingkarl 136]

haha, i swear some of these texts have been taken from my phone.

this is hilarious.

so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."

(805): Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?

(1-805): Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.

[M325is 0]

if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder

hahah

Serves her right for not taking the money first

[Livi 0]

(845): I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.

ahahahaahha awesome!

(810): I'm laying in your front yard are you home

ahahaha another epic one!

had a good laugh

[Guest Simon*]

(773): When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"

(312): Prob not but she was surprised

McLovin' it

[Forrest 35]

Wholy cheeseballs is a treasure trove of gems in that site

[e30plz 1]

Yeah plenty of lol's on there,

But then some are just plain weird..

(314): My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig

Edited April 27, 2009 by E30ONP

[Driftit 1964]

Haha awesome. Just had a read of them all. Txtn can be bad. Have lost two relationships due to misdirected txts.

Edited April 27, 2009 by driftit

[tire 10]

Whoa this is awesome. Too many to quote but..

(312): How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?

[Jamez 2147483647]

Haha awesome. Just had a read of them all. Txtn can be bad. Have lost two relationships due to misdirected txts.

spill the beans.......

[pjay 8]

Haha awesome. Just had a read of them all. Txtn can be bad. Have lost two relationships due to misdirected txts.

f**k, I know what you mean bra. Calling ftw

[*Glenn* 854]

Young guy text's his GF.... " Feeling horny ? I do"

Answer: "NO !! this is your mother"

FAIL

[Apex 693]

Haha awesome. Just had a read of them all. Txtn can be bad. Have lost two relationships due to misdirected txts.

sh*t, Drunk text cost me a wedding and started an ongoing family feud and court case.. Im very carful now.

Some classics on that site

[M325is 0]

Young guy text's his GF.... " Feeling horny ? I do"

Answer: "NO !! this is your mother"

FAIL

When my partner Craig lived in Te Aroha and myself in Auckland I would sometimes send him randy txts, unfortunately one time I was watching tv at the same time (so not quite aware of my address book) and hit send... to my brother Craig! Who was in the room next door... HOW EMBARRASSING!

Next time I see you I'm guna....

[e30plz 1]

Oh god, Rofl.

Bet that was awkward

[Driftit 1964]

Yeah when you have an argument with the Mrs never text your mate saying she is being a bitch and your going to try hook into another chick at the party. Never ends well when you send it to the Mrs. And you think I would have learnt the first time.

I no longer like to text.

Edited April 27, 2009 by driftit